“This is not me being pretentious; this is me being menopausal,” said Kay Mellor as she employed the use of a Spanish fan whilst in conversation with TV critic Paul Hoggart. This was a typically candid exchange from one of the most down to earth, honest and generous interviewees that I think I’ve ever come across.

Mellor is the sort of writer that gives you faith in yourself because she just seems so normal (not that I am saying writers aren’t normal as a general rule, but they are often a bit, well, writerly). She is warm, engaging and approachable, hiding a fierce intelligence behind a jovial and bubbly conversational style. She’s so lovely, in fact, that I want to ask her to be my Mum.

Mellor’s story goes something like this; fall pregnant at 16 and leave school with no O’levels, get married and have another baby by 19, return to education in mid twenties and develop a passion for theatre in all its forms, form own theatre company, become TV actress in order to support husband’s (the same one, mind) dreams, send producer a revised script of the show in which you are in and gain script editor’s job, work on shows like Corrie and Brookside, write Band of Gold. Most of us know the Mellor story from that point on. For those of you who don’t, she’s the one who brought us Fat Friends, The Chase and Playing the Field, and is one of the most respected TV writers working in the UK today.

Perhaps it’s her northern roots, but I suspect that Mellor’s work ethic has played as big a part in her career as her talent. This woman can graft. When she was researching Band of Gold, for example, she spent months speaking to working girls in Leeds, often pounding the pavement with them for hours. This is pretty typical of how she does her research.

You also get the sense that you wouldn’t want to mess with her. For all her warmth, charm and ease with people, there is also a certain steeliness when it comes to standing up for what she believes in. “Namby pamby writers who accept any [story changes] aren’t good writers. Good writers will kill to protect their story,” she said at one point. She also advocates for any TV writer to get onto a soap- any, really (the aforementioned one that she script edited was the dire Albion Market). These are the best training ground, according to Mellor. The secret is knowing when to leave.

Her best advice? Perhaps there is too much to choose from, but this certainly stuck in my mind, so I’ll pass it on: “People who write at weekends are writers, but if you want to be a real writer you have to graft. You’ve got to put your mind in places you don’t want to go.”

Writers, take note. The lady means business.

I’d like to say a little more about how this session went, but a few days of little sleep and long hours have meant that my concentration was at an all time low.  Unfortunately Hampton’s soft voice and hesitant speech weren’t the best remedy for this.  He’s an interesting guy, but it would have taken an Anthony Robbins style speaker alone to keep me engaged.

Whether you enjoyed the session or not would depend on whether you were a fan of his work (natch) but it was certainly interesting to hear him speak about his collaboration with David Lean in the 80s on Nostromo, the film that Lean never got to make and the one that, it was rumoured, lead to his death.

Hampton started life writing plays, and assumed when he moved to screenplays that it would be easier due to the lack of constraints.  Over ten or so unsuccessful years he came to see the error of his ways.  When asked about his path to screenwriting, his own method, he gave two stipulations: One, respect the difficulty of the craft and two, set constraints for yourself.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last couple of days, it’s that screenplays take a long, long time to see the light of day.  Hampton confirmed this with a story of his own.  It took him 17 years to make his Lytton Strachey biopic, in the end having to direct it himself.  But there is heartening news here; he learned how to direct from a how-to book and a friend willing to impart knowledge in two days.  Who needs the NFTS??

Ah, notes.  Just when you think your work here is done and that you can sit back and wait for shooting to begin, along comes a producer with a load of suggestions on how the story needs to change.  As the always-entertaining Julian Fellowes explains, the first time a writer receives notes, they can feel as though they have failed as an artist, or at least as though the producer has failed to correctly interpret the script.  But notes are a necessary evil in the life of the screenwriter, and the thrust of this session was about how to both receive them, and-for the producers in the audience- the most effective way to deliver them.

What this basically involves is developing an individual strategy for receiving notes.  For Fellowes, this means getting the notes delivered by email so that he has a week to calm down and begin to think rationally before he will arrange a meeting to discuss them.  For others, a face to face meeting may be preferable from the outset, possibly the same kind of people who smoke on petrol forecourts and use wasps nests as piñatas when they get bored.  Whatever your preferred method, the chances are that this will be something that you develop through trial and error.  Hell- for some screenwriters, to even be in such a situation is a dream come true.

Of course, some producers tend to write blundering, unhelpful notes that are half the length of the script itself, and this is also something that was addressed, with David Pearson and The UKFC’s Tanya Seghatchian providing the production experience in the panel.  Both agreed that notes need to be kept as concise as possible and that there is a ‘time and a place’ to give them.  Fellowes elaborated on this.  He made the point that a story is in a constant state of evolution, and that by the time the film is being wrapped up it can have literally hundreds of people working on it, and hundreds of potential changes that need to be made.  A good producer will be sensitive to what stage the script is in: You can mention holes in the structure from the outset, but leave the props til later.

Relationships between writers and producers are often spoken of in terms of (usually dysfunctional) marriages.  Fellowes pointed out that when you get married, you know that when you introduce your spouse to your friends, their favourites will not necessarily be your favourites.  It’s worth bearing in mind that their suggestions may actually be helpful.  Ultimately, though a script starts with you, it becomes the property of others and that means other ideas.   And if you don’t like it, stick to writing novels.

This session was mysteriously marketed as ‘the politics of being a scriptwriter’, so I had half expected to find Peter Morgan at the front of the room.  In fact, it turned out to be a really entertaining hour, hosted by AP Watts agent Rob Krait and script editor Kate Leys, that dealt with the practicalities of selling yourself as a business.  Some writers do this naturally, but for those of you who fall into the camp of hoping that a friendly producer might find your masterpiece on a train and hunt you to the ends of the earth to get it made (or is that just me?) they had some useful things to say.  Reading back over my notes, some of these seem embarrassingly obvious.  Make sure you deliver a script on time?  Well, duh!  The trouble is that writers often forget things that it any other business would be classed as a given.  This wasn’t just an hour devoted to truisms, however; there were a few surprising elements thrown in.  For example, I was quite surprised to learn that time really is on the side of the scriptwriter.  If someone likes your script and asks to see a revised draft, you don’t actually have to sleep-deprive yourself into an early grave to get it done.  A good screenplay will stick in the mind of a producer for a long time- at least thirteen years, according to one anecdote by Leys.  Although that may be taking the p**s just slightly.

Other suggestions; self-belief is everything, so practise at all times; stand up for your script; don’t chase development money because there isn’t any, and be businesslike about your script- get legal advice; contracts are not your domain so why not leave it to the experts?

The session began with a topic entitled ‘No one knows anything’ and in my opinion it was worth attending just to hear them expand on this.  Ever met with a producer or executive- or indeed, even with another writer- and postured your way through the next half hour, talking in sweeping statements in attempt to make yourself appear like you know what you’re doing?  Ever noticed how everyone else does the same thing?  It’s because no one knows anything, see?  But everyone wants to appear as if they do.  Congratulations; you’ve had your first proper introduction to the film industry.  Unless you’ve read William Goldman, that is.  Which I haven’t, but after hearing all this I think I just might.

The title of this session suggested one of those nakedness exercises that drama students have to do, and this wasn’t too far from the truth.  Ronald Harwood gamely allowed Professor Michael Fitzgerald (The disgraced Raj Persaud has discreetly slipped off of this year’s line-up, it would appear) to ask him all kinds of questions about the psyche of a writer, an endlessly fascinating subject for a group of people who are prone, let’s face it, to a fair amount of navel gazing.  Harwood’s candid answers made for many humorous moments (writers can be motivated by money?  Say it isn’t so!) as well as some genuinely insightful glances into the mind of a successful writer.  For Ronald Harwood, being the son of Jewish refugees has clearly played a large part in his career as a writer, and he talked at length about ‘the memory of collective suffering’.  On the whole, however, Harwood himself is a pretty normal person: he likes to be around people; he isn’t precious about his work; he’s been with the same wife for nigh-on fifty years and he goes about writing in a very businesslike manner.  In a way, it would have been great to see one of the more neurotic members of our community up on the stage, but then, they wouldn’t have agreed to be interviewed by a shrink, would they?

Professor Fitzgerald is clearly fascinated by the mind of a writer (I’m glad someone is) and has even written books on the subject.  So far, he has broadly classified writers into two strands.  Firstly, ‘autistic’ kinds, like Ibsen and Swift (clue; if you carry round a notebook everywhere, this could be you).  Secondly, hysterical writers.  I need only explain this by saying that Byron was one.  Fitzgerald reckons, however, that writers can be broken down into many classifications, so watch this space.  In another fifty years we may have binomial nomenclature.

The link between madness and creativity is an endless source of fascination, and last year’s lecture on the theme was equally well-attended.  But here’s the thing:  Does it really matter?  I have a sneaking suggestion that musing on this lofty topic is just another excuse to not write the damned screenplay.

For some writers, producers are the scourge of creativity, and an unfortunate by-product of the business of getting your script turned into a film.  If this is you, then Stephen Woolley may just be the man to change your mind.  In one of the first sessions of the festival, he outlined ten ‘secrets’ that can make for happy and successful collaborations.  Except they’re not really secrets any more, because now two hundred of us know them and in a minute, so will you…

1)    Agree with what you’re attempting to do.  In other words, don’t start writing a comedy and then turn it into a drama.  And if the comedy was so unfunny that you tried to label it a drama in an attempt to salvage it, it probably wasn’t that good in the first place.

2)    Don’t get so into the research that you never end up writing anything.  In my case, the ‘research’ usually involves bad telly, trashy magazines or the contents of my fridge.

3)     Don’t get so hung up on what the ‘experts’ say that you start trying to shoehorn a perfectly fine story into three acts just  for the sake of it.  Or twelve.  Or twenty two…

4)    Don’t write a script that comes in at 400 pages.  Not if you want the producer to read it, that is.

5)    Don’t take rejection personally.  This may sound tantamount to slapping you in the face and suggesting you don’t get angry, but writers, take heart: The Crying Game was the most rejected script that Woolley has ever dealt with.  And we all know how that story turned out.

6)    Try and listen to what people have to say when it comes to your script.  Yes, backers will make stupid suggestions.  Yes, they may rant and rave and appear demented.  But in amongst all that ranting, something they will say may make some sense.

7)    Don’t price yourself out of the market by writing a script with a budget rivaling Roman Abramovich’s personal fortune.  It will very likely not get made- even if it is really, really good.

8)    Don’t fill your script with unnecessary description.  As Woolley pointed out, if your script calls for Rembrandt-esque lighting, the fact that Rembrandt isn’t available for the project may mean it gets pushed to the bottom of the pile.

9)    Don’t allow yourself to become a political pawn between the director and producer.  Even if they offer great bribes.

10)    Be prepared to kill your darlings.  Okay, so no one ‘gets’ the script like you do, but maybe, just maybe, other people’s suggestions could improve the story.  The rest of the industry didn’t get to where they were by accident, you know.

The key to surviving any film festival is the same as the key to creating a good film: pacing. Bouncing from one film to the next for days on end, you may start mixing up story lines from different movies. Did the girl from the sex addicts anonymous meeting end up sleeping with the winner of the grocery bagging competition? A little down time at the Target Red Room provides everything from water, snacks, ice cream, coffee, an open bar, wi-fi and just a nice place to meet filmmakers and other industry types.

Of course, no matter how plumb the sponsored amenities might be, if the films aren’t strong, then surviving a festival becomes a battle with boredom. Credit goes to the LA Film Festival programmers for selecting an impressively diverse line up of films. They’ve managed the ’something for everyone’ motif with the right balance. I’ve been to festivals that have tried that approach but forgot that “everyone” doesn’t mean only people with subscriptions to The New Yorker.

The narrative competition features films void of star power but heavy with emotional, intimate and personal stories ranging from a new year’s eve one-night stand gone right (Medicine For Melancholy) to a New York street hustler becoming a single father overnight (Prince Of Broadway) to a kleptomaniac’s tale (The Pleasure Of Being Robbed). Alternative choices vary from short films, music videos and documentaries to guilty pleasures and family films (though not in the same theater I believe).

Tonight I head back to the Ford Amphitheater for a screening under the stars of the rock doc “Anvil! The Story Of Anvil” - about two childhood friends who founded the Canadian hard rock metal band ‘Anvil’ in 1973 and now find themselves middle aged still trying to make it despite all the odds. True examples of survival.

I’ve just come from a screening of The New Ten Commandments at the Filmhouse. An amazing project - a collection of films by various directors to mark the 60th anniversary of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Very innovative. Whether you are a documentarian or not, you should go see this film. It’s on twice this weekend, so if you’re in Edinburgh there are no excuses! Plus the first film is by Shooter David Graham Scott. Hurray!

Yesterday was the Jersey Untapped panel. Our friend Philip Ilson (also of LSFF) was on the panel as the co-curator of the Branchage Jersey Intl Film Festival. Also on the panel was Andrew Sugden, Director of Enterprise and Business Development for Jersey Enterprise. He was telling us that it is a particularly good time for filmmakers to film on Jersey because of the embryonic stage of the industry there and the opportunity for filmmakers to have a real hand in shaping its future. In addition to this, Andrew and the Branchage Festival Director and Channel Islander herself, Xanthe Hamilton were filling us in on the great locations on the island - an underground complex of WW2 war tunnels and 13th century castles.

Xanthe was saying that these will also be the settings for some of the screenings at the inaugural Branchage Jersey film festival this September. I’ll be doing my damnedest to blag a trip to the festival.

Shooters interested in doing business on Jersey should definitely make it to the festival for the Friday (the festival runs from Thursday 25-28 September) as Xanthe said this is when there will be the big finance event and location tours of the island.

After this I went off to the UKFC Completion Fund Shorts screening and party. Dead Dog seemed to be everyone’s favourite - particularly for a stunning scene in which the actress does a mesmeric dance which she later told me she choreographed in 4 minutes! I loved Ralph as well - a beautifully shot, very touching short about a young London lad who finds himself stranded in Marseilles.

This afternoon I have lots of meetings in the Filmhouse before the Raindance Live! Ammo! event and Shooting People/Wallflower party in the Delegate’s Centre tonight - I hope to see you there!! Live!Ammo! at 7.30, Afterparty at 9.30

Photos from the UKFC Completion Fund Shorts party

(I apologise for their massive size but the computer wouldn’t let me resize them! Computer says no indeed…

Me and Jolyon Rubinstein (Producer, First)

Barrington Robinson (Producer, The Hero’s Journey), Kate Taylor (Festival Director, LSFF/Abandon Normal Devices festival (March 2009) and me

Jolyon and Grant Keir (Producer)

In the interest of keeping this blog as an honest and warts’n'all account of the festival experience, below are some less than flattering pictures of the Trailblazers party on Monday night. Pretty.

Yesterday I saw the International Shorts and then the UK Shorts - where I was really impressed by the programme and very pleased to see some gorgeous shorts from so many Shooters. On a side note, I also sat behind Chiwetel Ejiofor, whose debut short Slapper was screening. What a nice back of the head he has, mmm. Slapper was pleasantly surprising, although perhaps not so surprising given his predictably brilliant cast led by Iain Glen.

I don’t know if it was the lack of sleep making me vulnerable but I have to admit I was fighting to hold back a lump in my throat on seeing Shooter Tinge Krishnan’s First - a beautiful depiction of the relationship between two best friends, a girl with learning disabilities and a unique approach to playing the piano and her rapper accompaniest. I thought Daniel Mulloy’s Son was stunning, set in an impressive underground location which was made good use of in a chase scene.

In the evening I saw The Art Star and the Sudanese Twins about artist Vanessa Beecroft’s attempted adoption of the aforementioned twins and haven’t stopped fuming since. An interesting if grotesque insight into the art world and the lengths some artists will go for their work.

I bumped into Kate Taylor of the London Short Film Festival - and now the Abandon Normal Devices festival (coming in March 09) - who had also seen The Art Star. We had quite the rant about art, exploitation and the use of ‘ordinary’ people by artists. We made some brilliant points but unfortunately I don’t think there’s the space to recount them here. Shame…

We’d both just come out of a screening in the Cameo of Christine Molloy and Joe Lawlor’s debut feature Helen - where Chiwetel was again (great minds think alike, clearly). Chrstine and Joe’s short Who Killed Brown Owl is on the first collection of Best v Best and Helen opens with a similarly beautiful slo-mo sequence panning across a park - which alone makes the film worth seeing.

I’m just off now to the Branchage - Jersey Intl Film Festival panel but I might try and get some food in first. When do these kerazy festival cats eat? Or sleep for that matter…

L-R: Alex Gandar (Britdoc), Becca Frankel (FourDocs), Philip Ilson (Branchage - Jersey Intl Film Festival/LSFF) and me (Tamsin, SP!)

L-R: Adam (filmmaker), me, Finlay (Scottish Documentary Institute), Rebecca (Scottish Documentary Institute), Adam (filmmaker), and Alex (Britdoc).

SDI’s Finlay ‘wows’ Rebecca and I with his Blue Steel.

So, after a mammoth journey to Edinburgh lasting 12 hours, two trains and two three-hour delays, I’m finally here.

I’ve already seen some weird and wonderful shorts in the Trailblazers Shorts programme - notably ‘Outcasts’ and ‘Geriatrics - The Musical’.

The latter features a star performance from a maggot rock band and an exploding prostate (did I mention it was animated?). What can I say, I’ve got classy taste. But actually, the music is really good! Coming to West End theatres soon… Maybe not. ‘Outcasts’ was an amazing road trip following a group of disabled rockabilly hijackers who take a navel-gazing boy-band member as their hostage. The writing really stood out from the rest of the programme which seemed to shy away from dialogue, which was a shame I thought.

* Don’t forget: if you’re an Edinburgh delegate, come to the Shooting People and Wallflower Press AfterParty! Following Raindance’s Live! Ammunition! Pitching event this Thursday in the Delegate’s Centre from 7.30pm.

Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/TamsinSP

Congratulations again to the following Shooters who have been selected to screen at this year’s Edinburgh International Film Festival.

BRITISH GALA

Chris Waitt - A Complete History of My Sexual Failures

Christine Molloy and Joe Lawlor - Helen (World Premiere)

SPECIAL EVENTS

David Graham Scott - The New Ten Commandments (World Premiere)

DOCUMENT

Lindsay Goodall - Irene

Finlay Pretsell - Ma Bar

Margaret Brown - The Order of Myths

SCOTTISH SHORT DOCUMENTARY

Sarah Tierney - Christmas with Dad

ANIMATION

Tom Mead - Cryen

Matthew Walker - Operator

Anne Wilkins - Sun in the Night Time

Greg Villalobos - What’s Fufu?

MIRRORBALL

Matt Wolf - Wild Combination: A Portrait of Arthur Russell

SHORTS

Rob Curry- Domestics

Tinge Krishnan - First

Andrew Griffin - The Cinematic Orchestra Presents… To Build a Home

Andrea Harkin - The Flyer

Alex Winckler - Ralph

Moby Longinotto - Smalltown Boy

Daniel Mulloy - Son

Anders Jedenfors - Space Travel According to John

UKFC COMPLETION FUND SHORTS

Barrington Robinson- The Hero’s Journey

UNDER THE RADAR

Rona Mark - Strange Girls

S A Halewood - Bigga than Ben: A Russians’ Guide to Ripping Off London

www.edfilmfest.org.uk